But if she's an exotic dancer, that complicates things. There are lots of stereotypes you need to be aware of and ignore before you make your move, or else you'll ruin your chances of ever getting to know her better. The key is to show sincerity in a setting where the focus is often on appearance and money. Steps 1 Offer the benefit of the doubt. Before you even step into a club, make a conscious effort to be open-minded. Don't assume that because they are strippers, they must be promiscuous and unable to make money in any other way.
Some dancers are very intelligent and might be doing what they do to pay their own way through college or nursing school. Other dancers might have had very unfortunate circumstances that you couldn't even imagine, and might be working at a club to feed their family or send their child to a good school. It's very easy to judge a book by its cover, but you'll never get very far with a stripper worth dating if you go that route.
Strippers get lots of attention, in the club and oftentimes out of it. If you can't handle your partner receiving plenty of admiration, dating a stripper is probably not for you. Don't go into a relationship with a stripper thinking you can 'change' her or expect her to get another job. Either accept that she strips or find someone who doesn't. Usually the type of club you go to will determine the type of women that work there.
Some clubs are characterized by very young inexperienced girls, jaded veterans, gold diggers or all of the above. On the one hand, we know our work ethic, scrappiness, and passion for dance makes us total catches, and we want to scream it from the rooftops. Still, when something's a big part of your life, you kind of have to tell people. Just not people on Tinder, because yikes.
If they do the Wiley Coyote tongue thing at a modest pole picture: Still, the ignorance is there, and the fear and prejudice are very real. I was explaining to one dude how I worked as a pole instructor and sometimes did bachelorette parties, and he was like, "I'm sorry, but that's really slutty. So here's what I know after four years on the pole: The girls all had different sections to themselves, with curtains that closed each part off, so it was more private and intimate.
Anyway, you'll think to yourself "what an idiot" but I asked her if she was single, I thought "f.. She told me she was, so I said to her "You obviously fancy me, so let's go for a drink? She said "why would you think I fancy you? So I went back to sitting with my mates and we were chatting for a bit, so another girl came over and I asked her if she could send the other girl one I liked back over, so she went over and got her.
I then whispered in her ear and asked for her number, but she said "I'm not just going to give you my number, I don't know you" so I asked her for another dance and we went back downstairs.
'I was seen as an object, not a person'
Lap Dance Etiquette
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